AMIA ARCHIVE • View topic

Last edited by Dead on Sun, Jan 04 2015, 23:46 PM, edited 9 times in total.

<< BOO-HOO Your mother died Trades >>

Proudly presents:

Freshly exumated, hand picked and perfectly preserved cadavers,
straight from your local graveyard, now avalible for sale! Whether
you are a professional anatomist, a thanatologist, an undertaker
who would like to put them back to where you think they belong,
or you are a Kelemvorite corpse shagger just feeling lonely
matters not:

Meet your needs or supprise your loved ones with an original gift!

Why get your hands and boots muddy when there are people who enjoy
doing this for you? For a minimal price of 999 gp. per body order today
your very own, personal corpse!

*Special ripoff for Kelemwhorites

*tacked up under a few of notices* I know places to get freshly exhumed corpses for considerably less. Your price is not at all competetive.

*a quite irritated looking druidess removes the notes from the roadsigns in the forest*

Krugan will see the sign along the roadside and take one. Anyone near will hear his sigh as his whispers to himself....

"And so it begins...."

Those found along the frontier are removed. Should they reappear they are removed again by a man clad in the armour of the former Dawnguard. Usually their 'removal' is an ancient air elemental shattering them to pieces.

A black-haired priestess looks at one of these signs and writes on the bottom of it.

This is stupid.

*Any posted on the Road from the Dale to Cordor, and anywhere in between are taken by a tall guardin a blue trimemd uniform, marking him as a Seargent*

*Arc walks by and manages to see one of the signs and takes out a stool to read it more accurate given his stunted height.*

"Seriously....bloody lack of honor nicker grabbin body snatchin grave robbin boot lickin sick son of a giants arses..."

*He reads the sign with one of his rants going and takes it down and goes to pin it at the keep with a knife in it as a laugh of the month thing.*

// It would help if you told where they are posted //

*Mikal eyes the sign and carefully removes one, moving with it back to the Cathedral*

It would seem that someone has replaced all the posters
bellow the roadsigns in the unguarded areas, and keeps
replacing them as they disappear.

*the rare occasions he might manage to place a note when he finds the forest-roads without any druids or rangers nearby, they are removed only a short time later*

A darkcloaked small winged being can be seen removing a notice, placing a notice.

One for the nose two for the eyes a set to come and a set to go, one I say it that I would like. Location of meet needed golds a having a body a taking. Speak of old tongue in places forgotten to continue.

She looked at the notice for a long moment. She then looked at the sky. Again, the tiny Halfling stared at the notice, puzzled, as she scratched the back of her ear...

Quote:

...Weather
you are a professional anatomist...

Finally, she looked at the sky again as she murmured to herself.

So... The weather is a professional anatomist?

*A balding wizard dressed in brown clothing sees one of these signs before they are ripped down, pissed on, shat on, or whatever else the do-gooders feel is necessary to do to them.*

"Fantastic!" *he exclaims*

*Because he loves to hear the sound of his own voice so much, and because he thinks his opinion is so valued, he feels it is appropriate to comment out loud, even though it is likely no one is around to hear him*

"Exactly what I have been looking for, what a great initiative. A steady supply of cadavers is exactly what I need. I shall search for this or these traders, post haste!"

A stout dwarf wearing a symbol of Moradin would tear down any notice left close to Bendir. And tack up his own addressed to whom ever posted it.

If I be catchin' ye dealing in such a foul business. Ye be meetin' me hammer. Ye have been warned.

the note is unsigned.

*A weak scowling dwarf would see the notice, his hand playing with his dark beard as he reads it, eyes impassive, all the while a bat dances about his head*

Ach, tha' be a wee bit much gold fer a deader

*He would carefully write down the name of both suppliers in a dog eared journal*

Last edited by Growlot on Thu, Dec 22 2011, 21:33 PM, edited 1 time in total.

//Oppsey, Double post. Removed

*A fully dark cloth covered male walks by and writes on a note before pasting it* "I am Interested... Where do you want to meet?"

'Bellow it another note is left'

Lowland swamps. Midnight.

Moving between Cordor and Bendir Dale, a pair of Sylvan Elves will be seen. The man will stop, make note of the letter and shake his head.

If any can overhear him, he will speak softly to his companion, a woman with a great bow.

It is quite odd to see such being sold. While study is needed I would hope proper rites are done to insure these are not used to make undead and that the fresher ones are not being killed for profit nor graves of beloved family are being disturbed Sere.

They would continue on their way, felling quite a few orcs, goblins and kobolds. He will then mention to Sere his companion that perhaps these are the types of freshly dead that are for sale.

The signs are found again along the surface crossroads.

Akantha paused read the sign and couldn't help think to herself "Who would pay that much for bodies you can get for free"

*the posters along the roadsigns through the forest are once again ripped down by a rather irritated looking druid who is cursing in a foreign language during that task*

Nothing but cinder and ash remains of the sign outside Bendir Dale.

Eddie eyes the sign for a moment, with a cigarette between his lips. After a while he cackles and shakes his head.

"Priceless" is what he says before his departure.

"Ewwww" Is the only thing heard from Brenna as she passes by.

An envelope is sent in return. Inside lies a elegantly written letter with a flamboyant portrait of the author stamped on it, perhaps to easier recognize the owner for future transactions or meetings.(If your PC have viewed the portrait, Your PC will recognize Hashim) A return address is also scribbled on the poster, leading to a postbox in Wiltun keep.

To the corpse desecrator.

CEASE YOUR ACTIONS IMMIDIATEDLY AND TURN YOURSELF OVER TO THE AUTHORITIES OF KHOLINGEN, LEAST I SHALL TRACK YOU DOWN AND DO IT MYSELF. YOUR VILE CRIME DESERVES FITTING PUNISHMENT.
TURN YOURSELF OVER AND YOU WILL BE GRANTED LENIENCE.

BY THE USE OF SCRYING AND FORESIGHT I SHALL HUNT YOU DOWN SHOULD YOU FAIL TO COMPLY. YOU CANNOT HIDE.

YOU HAVE 10 DAYS!

Shortly after Brenna passes by the sign, Wadrana casually wipes some dragon blood off her sword and raises a brow.

"...Seriously?"

Last edited by MutantMike on Fri, Aug 17 2012, 9:55 AM, edited 1 time in total.

Garrett, upon hearing the news of this, sets out and begins to question anyone in towns or cities about any civilians who mightve bought a corpse and if it was either being a loved one or for their own cruel and perverted cause. Instead of ripping down the posters himself, he would paint over them with the words;

LET THE DEAD REST

//Except for that fact that he would have no way of knowing who has purchased corpses without investigating further, since no purchaser has left a name above, and since NPCs are the purview of the DMs so you don't know how they would react without involving a DM.

Fresh corpses for sale! [roadsigns]

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